As the internet once again debates whether airing other people’s dirty laundry online is ever justified, another classic of the genre has emerged.


A Twitter user by the name of Adam Neumann’s Chief of Staff (referring to the co-founder and former CEO of WeWork who was played by Jared Leto in Apple’s WeCrashed) tweeted earlier this week, “Yo if your name is Omar and you’re from San Rafael, your girl Jessica who works at Starbucks is cheating on you. I’m waiting for my food and she’s talking about it with her coworkers behind the counter.”



He continued, “Might not have said anything but she made me wait 10 mins to hand me my mobile order that was just sitting there, while she regaled her coworkers of her exploits in explicit detail.”


His final tweet offered some advice to Omar: “Honestly Omar, you should just focus on yourself King.”


Most people offered their sympathies to Omar, but some asked why OP was snitching, particularly when he didn’t have all the facts. When someone asked how he could embarrass Omar and Jessica like this, he responded, “It’s less embarrassing for Omar this way.”


Bizarrely, some people speculated about what Omar could have done to cause Jessica to cheat on him. One person suggested, “Maybe Omar needs to learn how to please a woman. Most men do not know how to do this consistently,” a response that says more about the poster than Omar, tbh. OP was ready to defend his new buddy, however, replying with, “Based on the tale she told, Omar just needs to pick better women.”


While it’s undoubtedly better to know you’re being cheated on, this would definitely be among the strangest ways to learn that information. As one user put it, “Imagine learning about this on Twitter from a parody account.”