A lot of people hate me for being beautiful and slim. Those fat whales sit on their couches for hours, eating fried chicken and putain (the newest fatty favorite snack). Here's the news flash - you think it's such an injustice you're fat? Do something about it, fatsos! But sometimes people actually try to go on a diet and some self-proclaimed experts mess with their heads with idiotic tips

After skimming through Rin's "easy tricks to lose weight over time" blog, I realised some people can get so misinformed, that they might even gain some more weight. Why? Because her diet program is a load of crap. No wonder she's a fat hog.

Here's a diet that ACTUALLY WORKS. You can lose 4 kilos in a week!

Here's what you need to prepare:

For each day get a half-litre bottle of mineral water.

Let's say you want to lose 3 kilos. Prepare 8 bottles of mineral water. Take 3 pills of LSD and crush them. Try to divide it into 8 even portions and put one into each bottle. Shake it and put it into the fridge.

Anytime during the week, when you feel hungry, drink a few sips of The Serum. Do it until you don't feel the hunger anymore. One bottle should be enough for the whole day. Drink a lot of liquids and don't eat anything for the whole week.

After a week, you'll notice that you are much slimmer. Now for the hard part. You need to eat a small portion of food every 3 hours for a few days. Presto. You're 3 kilos slimmer in a week!

You're welcome