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Twitter Highlights: 22 of the Funniest Tweets From Today August 23, 2023

Despite Elon doing everything in his power to run Twitter into the ground, the bird app is still one of the best places online for people looking for a good laugh.

Twitter Highlights: 24 of the Best Tweets From Today August 22, 2023

The best of Twitter, I mean, X.

Man Gets Dumped After Saying He'd Consider Giving a BJ For $1,000,000

OP joked that his girlfriend should do it instead and she responded that she wouldn’t blow the new friend for million dollars.

Guy Forcefully Kisses a Squirrel to Advertise His Teeth-Whitening Products

"That squirrel was gagged," @islandthembo tweeted.

24 Cursed Randoms You Can't Unsee

If you can think of it, it exists.

Woman Plays the Ass In Billie Eilish Cover Song

It’s never too late to master an instrument even if said instrument is your body part.

Neighbors Call 911 On "Dead Man" Who Was Actually Just Having the Best Nap of His Life

TikTok user @cauliflowercarol noticed a man parked outside her apartment who “had a smashed car window and looked dead,” and when we say looked dead—he looked already six feet under.

20 Facepalms and Fails to Help You Forget About Your Flaws

There's nothing better to help you forget about your own shortcomings than the follies of others.

'How You Get Slapped Into PRAYER': TBS' 'Power Slap' Gets Biblical

The world of combat sports is getting dicier and dicier every day. A clip from TBS’s controversial show, Power Slap: Road To The Title, has recently gone viral. The show which aired earlier this year features individuals competing in a slap fighting.

NBA Social Media Manager Goes Rogue on Facebook, Blasts Adam Silver and the NBA

From the outside, working as a social media manager for the NBA sounds like a dream gig. Watch basketball and post about it for a living? As @howsberger tweeted, “50k to find clips to post on social media? Run me that application.”

Guy Exposes Upstairs Neighbor’s Affair Because It’s Affecting His Sleep Schedule

What’s the furthest you would go to ensure a good night’s sleep? Earplugs and a sleep mask? White noise machine and humidifier? What about exposing your upstairs neighbor’s affair because their nighttime activities were keeping you awake?

Monday Morning Randomness - 45 Pics and Memes To Kick Off the Week

Take a quick break with this stellar batch of pics, memes and Xs (Tweets), chosen for the most sophisticated connoisseurs of random imagery.

HR Approves $100 Holiday Budget For 'Decorations' Only, Employee Abides

Redditor u/bamburger took to r/MaliciousCompliance to share with all of us Reddit plebeians the extent of his massive brain and all-encompassing wit.

Club Rat Dad Gets Sent a Message From His Baby Momma

It’s hard to get a person’s attention. Even harder when it’s your ex who you co-parent with.

Nothing Is Braver Than Laying on Your Horn Behind a Cop at a Traffic Light

The man below either has a death wish or a complete disregard for any sense of consequence. No matter which one it is, I must salute him.

20 Funny Facts So Dumb They Must Be True

While some things sound ridiculous, these facts are actually true. At r/AskReddit we found some of the stupidest facts that people would never believe, but turns out they're true.

38 Great Pics and Funny Memes to Slay Your Boredom

Come check out this fresh new batch of pics, tweets and memes collected for your viewing pleasure.

25 Dank Memes That Are 'Funny and Sad'

Don't cry, it's just a meme.

20 Oblivious Dudes Who Missed Not So Subtle Hints From Interested Women

We all miss our shot once in a while, but these dudes were oblivious. At r/AskReddit there are some sad stories of dudes completely missing hints from interested women and ending up sad and alone.

Grindset Dude Bro Thinks He Invented Mornings, Afternoons In Viral Hustle Porn Rant

Until now, at least. On an episode of the Evan Carmichael Show featuring Ed Mylett, aka swagless Dave Bautista, Mylett explains how his own convoluted conception of time means that one day contains not one, not two, but three whole days.

Clueless New Employee Reports Co-Worker to HR for 'Lack of Help'

20 People Share Their Roommate Horror Stories

If you've ever lived in a house with strangers, then you know things can get out of hand.

'His Funeral Was Fun': Grandma Hilariously Rates Her Ex-Boyfriends

The internet's favorite nonagenarian, Grandma Lill is on TikTok answering important questions for the youth. How would she rate her ex-boyfriends?

Britney Spears Is Actually A Sword Guy

Britney Spears: International pop star, queen of spinning in circles and certified knife guy?

'How Is This Not the Biggest News for Humankind?': UFO Truthers Struggling to Return to Normal Life After Alien Hearing

Back in 2021, 60 Minutes aired a piece claiming that UFOs were “regularly spotted in restricted U.S. airspace.”