McJordan Special: Michael Jordan will put his name on literally any product on Earth for enough money. This extends to burgers. They took a regular burger, threw some bacon and BBQ sauce on there, and let His Airness sign off on it.

McSalad Shakers: You mean you have to violently shake a cup full of dressing? What could go wrong?

McPizza: They’ve tried this multiple times, and it never caught on. Not only was it not good, but it took 11 minutes to cook.

McLean Deluxe: In an attempt to wrangle the healthy crowd, Micky D’s pushed this part lean beef/part seaweed extract sandwich into the market. It failed.

McSpicy: While not a bad idea on paper, the McSpicy just never seemed to catch on with customers.

Son of Mac: It was exactly like the Big Mac, except smaller and without bread in the middle. So essentially, a hamburger.

McSpaghetti: There was no reason for this to be a thing, and yet there it was. It got worse, since some areas had test markets of lasagna and fettuccine.

Angus Burgers: McDonald’s thought burgers made from “pure Angus beef” would get people in the door. The snag was that most people couldn’t taste the difference and didn’t want to pay the jacked up price for what felt like the same thing. On a personal note, I admit to ordering these burgers nearly daily for about a full year. I never said I had a very refined palate though.

HulaBurger: A franchise owner in the 1960s was having problems with sales, being that his McDonald’s was in a primarily Roman Catholic area. He needed something to sell on Fridays when most customers couldn’t eat meat other than fish. Ray Kroc and the owner tried their ideas to see who bought more. Kroc came up with the Hulaburger that swapped the burger patty for grilled pineapple. The owner tried the Filet-O-Fish.

Bacon Bacon McBacon: Australia introduced this monstrosity, which included two patties, 5 pieces of bacon and 3 slices of cheese. Oh, and they dipped it in pork drippings.

McAfrica: In probably their most offensive idea, McDonald’s tried to push the McAfrica burger during the Olympics. They marketed it by saying it contained ‘an exotic African sauce’. They must have forgotten that much of Africa was experiencing devastating famine at the time, and managed to offend pretty much the whole world.

Mighty Wings: For reasons unknown, they got mega popular in Spain, China, Samoa, and the Virgin Islands. Yet in America, people weren’t as accepting.

Chopped Beefsteak Sandwich: They took a burger, elongated it, threw it on a roll with some onions, and served packets of steak sauce with it. The whole campaign self-destructed, taking this sandwich with it.

Onion Nuggets: Chopped onions, battered and deep fried. Nothing else. This item is missed by exactly nobody.

Eggs Benedict McMuffin: The failure of this is self explanatory. Eggs Benedict and fast-food do not mesh.

McHot Dog: While the founder of McDonald’s banned hot dogs (because he thought they weren’t sanitary), McDonald’s eventually tried to bring them back.

McLobster: The McLobster was pretty much lobster meat shoved in a hot dog bun with “McLobster sauce” and shredded lettuce. Honestly, there are certain foods that should never be too cheap. Seafood falls under that list of things.

McGratin Croquette: The McGratin Croquette (known as Gurakoro in Japan) was a particularly strange item specially created for the Japanese market. It contains deep fried macaroni, shrimp and mashed potatoes.

Fajitas and Burritos: While you can still get these in Canada, they aren’t available in the United States. I imagine that’s for the best.

Spanish Omelet Bagel: It seemed like a good idea at the time, but they forgot McDonald’s didn’t know how to make bagels. Or omelets.

McDLT: Bun and patty on one side, lettuce and tomato on the other. You then had to put it together yourself. People didn’t take to this since they were eating at McDonalds, not working there. Assembling the burger is not their job. This is ‘Merica after all, right?

McSoup: This was literally Campbell’s Soup served in a McDonald’s cup. Not sure who they thought people would be into this monstrosity.