25 Celebrities Who Are Probably Serial Killers

PocketEpiphany Published 11/13/2021 in wtf

They say the killer is always who we least suspect. And who is less suspicious than your favorite celebs?

Over on Reddit, users debated which celebs are most likely to secretly be serial killers. We've rounded up the craziest choices; did your favorite celeb make the list?

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1. Kris Jenner, sacrificing people to some deity to achieve her family fame & fortune empire. Dear Kris, I’m kidding, don’t cease and desist me, or sacrifice me, please
2. James-f*cking-Spader. The Lizard King.
3. Quentin Tarantino Obviously.
4. Robin Thicke. IDK why but he seriously creeps me the f*ck out
5. Owen Wilson... God can you imagine being strangled to death and as the last bits of consciousness fade away and your sight gets dim the last thing you just hear is, ".................Wow!"
6. Kanye West. I could see him going full end-of-the-world cult leader and offing hundreds of people with punch
7. Dog the Bounty Hunter. He's got the perfect cover if you think about it.
8. Jim Gaffigan. He's a comedian and he's always so nice but I can picture him talking about Waffle House while he's putting you in a chest.
9. Mark Zuckerberg. That lifeless face, that wealth of personal information, that series of scores to settle with pretty much everyone who has ever questioned his personal habits and inability to function like a human.
10. That cannibal guy Armie Hammer or whatever
11. Jared Leto. Look the guy just... I don't know he gives off the vibe of somebody who is in constant danger of being exposed for being a felon. He has weird energy.
12. Joel Osteen. He has the smile of someone with a pile of bodies buried in the backyard of his McMansion.
13. Jeff Bezos with the “I love you my alive girl” text
14. Kenneth Copeland. I know he's not exactly a mainstream celebrity but he is a televangelist so kind of a celebrity. He looks straight up demonic
15. Kevin Spacey. A bunch of the people who outed him are dead now, if I remember correctly
16. Dr.Phil. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if there were bodies hidden at Turn-About Ranch.
17. Tom Cruise married Mimi Roger's and decided to become celibate. He left her and hooked up with Nicole Kidman in her uber-hotness days aaaaand......became celibate. Tom Cruise has a basement full of male escorts he has ritually killed over the years and Scientologists have covered it up
18. Maybe not quite a serial killer but I’m thinking Drake is going to be named by R Kelly
19. Eric Clapton. Think about it... Hendrix is a rising star, set to overtake Clapton as the GOAT, then he dies shortly after befriending an initially very jealous Clapton. SRV starts ripping Hendrix songs and people are saying he'll be the next Jimi, then Clapton lets him use his helicopter and he dies. Skynyrd starts rocketing up the charts... plane crash. Mostly dead. Duane Allman won't let Clapton join the Allman Brothers... dead. He's a god damn murderer.
20. Gwyneth Paltrow. I can see her smiling dreamily at the fertility ritual where this year's finest summer intern is turned into Goop.
21. Ellen. It's the always unsmiling eyes to go with the extremely fake smile
22. Does Royalty count? If so…Prince Andrew or Prince Charles. Ran with Epstein. Was at the Island.
23. Would anyone be surprised if it turned out that Elon Musk hunted his childhood bullies on a private preserve for sport?
24. Actual cannibal Shia LaBeouf
25. OJ Simpson

1. Kris Jenner, sacrificing people to some deity to achieve her family fame & fortune empire. Dear Kris, I’m kidding, don’t cease and desist me, or sacrifice me, please
2. James-f*cking-Spader. The Lizard King.
3. Quentin Tarantino Obviously.
4. Robin Thicke. IDK why but he seriously creeps me the f*ck out
5. Owen Wilson... God can you imagine being strangled to death and as the last bits of consciousness fade away and your sight gets dim the last thing you just hear is, ".................Wow!"
6. Kanye West. I could see him going full end-of-the-world cult leader and offing hundreds of people with punch
7. Dog the Bounty Hunter. He's got the perfect cover if you think about it.
8. Jim Gaffigan. He's a comedian and he's always so nice but I can picture him talking about Waffle House while he's putting you in a chest.
9. Mark Zuckerberg. That lifeless face, that wealth of personal information, that series of scores to settle with pretty much everyone who has ever questioned his personal habits and inability to function like a human.
10. That cannibal guy Armie Hammer or whatever
11. Jared Leto. Look the guy just... I don't know he gives off the vibe of somebody who is in constant danger of being exposed for being a felon. He has weird energy.
12. Joel Osteen. He has the smile of someone with a pile of bodies buried in the backyard of his McMansion.
13. Jeff Bezos with the “I love you my alive girl” text
14. Kenneth Copeland. I know he's not exactly a mainstream celebrity but he is a televangelist so kind of a celebrity. He looks straight up demonic
15. Kevin Spacey. A bunch of the people who outed him are dead now, if I remember correctly
16. Dr.Phil. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if there were bodies hidden at Turn-About Ranch.
17. Tom Cruise married Mimi Roger's and decided to become celibate. He left her and hooked up with Nicole Kidman in her uber-hotness days aaaaand......became celibate. Tom Cruise has a basement full of male escorts he has ritually killed over the years and Scientologists have covered it up
18. Maybe not quite a serial killer but I’m thinking Drake is going to be named by R Kelly
19. Eric Clapton. Think about it... Hendrix is a rising star, set to overtake Clapton as the GOAT, then he dies shortly after befriending an initially very jealous Clapton. SRV starts ripping Hendrix songs and people are saying he'll be the next Jimi, then Clapton lets him use his helicopter and he dies. Skynyrd starts rocketing up the charts... plane crash. Mostly dead. Duane Allman won't let Clapton join the Allman Brothers... dead. He's a god damn murderer.
20. Gwyneth Paltrow. I can see her smiling dreamily at the fertility ritual where this year's finest summer intern is turned into Goop.
21. Ellen. It's the always unsmiling eyes to go with the extremely fake smile
22. Does Royalty count? If so…Prince Andrew or Prince Charles. Ran with Epstein. Was at the Island.
23. Would anyone be surprised if it turned out that Elon Musk hunted his childhood bullies on a private preserve for sport?
24. Actual cannibal Shia LaBeouf
25. OJ Simpson

Celebrity Serial Killers - - Kris Jenner

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Categories: Wtf Facepalm

Tags: celebrity celebrities celebs jared mark joel jeff hammer kevin ellen

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25 Celebrities Who Are Probably Serial Killers

1. Kris Jenner, sacrificing people to some deity to achieve her family fame & fortune empire. Dear Kris, I’m kidding, don’t cease and desist me, or sacrifice me, please

2. James-f*cking-Spader. The Lizard King.

3. Quentin Tarantino Obviously.

4. Robin Thicke. IDK why but he seriously creeps me the f*ck out

5. Owen Wilson... God can you imagine being strangled to death and as the last bits of consciousness fade away and your sight gets dim the last thing you just hear is, ".................Wow!"

6. Kanye West. I could see him going full end-of-the-world cult leader and offing hundreds of people with punch

7. Dog the Bounty Hunter. He's got the perfect cover if you think about it.

8. Jim Gaffigan. He's a comedian and he's always so nice but I can picture him talking about Waffle House while he's putting you in a chest.

9. Mark Zuckerberg. That lifeless face, that wealth of personal information, that series of scores to settle with pretty much everyone who has ever questioned his personal habits and inability to function like a human.

10. That cannibal guy Armie Hammer or whatever

11. Jared Leto. Look the guy just... I don't know he gives off the vibe of somebody who is in constant danger of being exposed for being a felon. He has weird energy.

12. Joel Osteen. He has the smile of someone with a pile of bodies buried in the backyard of his McMansion.

13. Jeff Bezos with the “I love you my alive girl” text

14. Kenneth Copeland. I know he's not exactly a mainstream celebrity but he is a televangelist so kind of a celebrity. He looks straight up demonic

15. Kevin Spacey. A bunch of the people who outed him are dead now, if I remember correctly

16. Dr.Phil. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if there were bodies hidden at Turn-About Ranch.

17. Tom Cruise married Mimi Roger's and decided to become celibate. He left her and hooked up with Nicole Kidman in her uber-hotness days aaaaand......became celibate. Tom Cruise has a basement full of male escorts he has ritually killed over the years and Scientologists have covered it up

18. Maybe not quite a serial killer but I’m thinking Drake is going to be named by R Kelly

20. Gwyneth Paltrow. I can see her smiling dreamily at the fertility ritual where this year's finest summer intern is turned into Goop.

21. Ellen. It's the always unsmiling eyes to go with the extremely fake smile

22. Does Royalty count? If so…Prince Andrew or Prince Charles. Ran with Epstein. Was at the Island.

23. Would anyone be surprised if it turned out that Elon Musk hunted his childhood bullies on a private preserve for sport?

24. Actual cannibal Shia LaBeouf

25. OJ Simpson

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