“Don’t you find it stupid that Obama is the only president without a last name?”

Boss: "Could you print out that file, scan it, and email it to me?" Me: "I could just email it to you." Boss: ...

American: "Do you have airplanes in South America?" Me: "No, I got here swinging on vines that hang from our trees"

If penguins need water to survive, doesn't that means they're fish?

Isn’t it a shame unicorns went extinct? This person was an adult and thought unicorns exists during medieval times.

“Are you gay?” “No.” “Why?” Hm I don’t know Jerry, just not feelin’ it today.

(I used to work at a bakery) a customer once asked me: "When the bread isn't warm anymore, that means it's not fresh anymore, so I can have it for free right?" -_- "no"

Going through the border -- from Canada into the U.S.: Border Guard: "What's your citizenship?" Me: [hands over passport, which notes my birthplace as Vancouver, British Columbia] "Canadian." Border Guard: "No, what's your citizenship?" Me: *louder* "I'm Canadian." Border Guard: *yelling* "What's your citizenship?!" Me: "I don't know what you're asking me!" Border Guard: "Where were you born? Was it Colombia?" Me: "British Columbia is a province in Canada." Border Guard: *waves me through*

Having a conversation about traveling. Me: I’ve always wanted to road trip up to Alaska and see the northern lights Her: (looking at me like I’m a moron*) oh yeah? How are you going to drive to Alaska?? Me: in my car... Her: You can’t DRIVE there And then I realized she thought Alaska was an island... I had to explain to her that although Alaska and Hawaii were always in little boxes next to the mainland of USA maps that doesn’t mean they’re both islands. 10 years later I married her...

One day one of my students said “Ew, I have to work today.” To which I replied, “So do I.” He looked at me and asked, honestly, “Oh really? Where do you work?” “Here...I work here...right where I am standing. I don’t do this as a service to your parents.”

My friend once asked, “What if they made a sea world but instead it’s centered around the land?” I responded with “So basically, a zoo?”

Not me, but overheard someone asking a restaurant server "Your coupon says it's valid 7 days a week, does this include weekends?"

my own sister asked me how we were related to my grandparents

Not anything super mind-boggling, but I worked as a server at a infamous "Italian" restaurant during college. Here's my interaction with a guest one evening: G: "I'd like to order the spaghetti with marinara sauce, but can I get fettuccine noodles instead?" M: "Sure thing." G: "Oh, and I'd like to please substitute the marinara with Alfredo sauce. And please add chicken." M: ".... I would have to charge you for the chicken Alfredo, then." (Note there was a few dollars in price difference between the two dishes, Alfredo being more expensive). G: "But I ordered the spaghetti with marinara." I legitimately had to argue with this person for few moments as to why I couldn't magically substitute out the entire entree for a different one with no price difference. Guest ended up being super crabby for the remainder of the time and I'm fairly certain didn't tip at all.

A girl asked me if honey came from bears. I’ll never forget it.

What’s the biggest planet on earth?

Is Cherry Vanilla Coke made with cherries and vanilla mixed together, or is it made with vanilla cherries? *vanilla cherries???*

My eyes are two different colors, and the question I'm most often asked about them is , "Did you know your eyes are two different colors?" I'm amused when someone asks me whether I see different colors out of each eye, or - even better - whether I "see in 3D."

My wife at the time saw the headline “Buffalo buried in 5 feet of snow” (I don’t remember the exact measurement). She asked “Why don’t they just dig the poor guy out?” There was a picture of the city under the headline.

My stepmom once asked if islands float around in the ocean. My brother burst out laughing, and I just looked flatly at my dad and said, "You married this woman." We still give her grief about it.

A coworker at the library was asked for aerial photos of the Colosseum in Rome. Before it was in ruins.

What nationality are you? *canadian* No, i mean, what nationality? *ummm, do you mean heritage? Polish I guess* No no, listen, na-tional-ity *I don’t know what you’re asking?* Whispers: Nationality, like, are you white, black, etc? *just look at me, I’m white as snow, and that’s not nation...* Cool I didn’t want to assume anything.

I was weighing a patient, and she asked me if it measured in Celsius.

On a ski lift "At what elevation do deer turn into elk?"

If you had a heart transplant, would your memories go away?

“Does Halloween ever fall on Friday the 13th?” Took my buddy a few seconds combined with our WTF stares to realize what he had just asked

When I moved back to Florida from Scotland a girl I was hitting on at a bar asked me how long a drive that was.

My cousin bought a map from a nearby fancy store for tourists. After perusing it for no less than two hours, she asked me, "How does this north-south stuff work? The side I'm facing is north, right? And if I turn right, north also turns right, no?" She was 20.

Had a customer ask if she could pay her bill over the phone. I asked what kind of credit card.... cash. She wanted to pay cash over the phone.

Was asked to a friend of mine who worked in a book shop. "Excuse me. Do these stairs go up?"

How long did it take you to drive from Australia - *to America*? I've been asked this twice. I wish I could say I had a witty response, but my brain froze as it tried to compute the stupidity of the question.

Do you actually believe in dinosaurs?

I wear a headscarf, and someone once asked me if I had ears.

I used to be a high school college prep teacher. One semester, I had quite a number of students who said they wanted to become surgeons. So one day I showed the class a neat video of a surgeon slicing open a grape with a scalpel and then stitching it back up with this new, technologically advanced pair of robotic arm things. The video was met with many oohs and aahs, and when it was over a hand shot up. I’ll never forget her question. “What was wrong with the grape?”

I had an American ask me if California was a state.

I used to work at Disney World and a question I would get on the daily is "What time is the 3 o'clock parade?"

When did dragons go extinct?