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1. "Luke, did I ever tell you these were your father's droids? We went on wild adventures together for over 3 years in the Clone Wars, and the little one even saved me from a swarm of buzz droids, yet I somehow don't recognize them anymore. They were good friends."
2. "Luke, did I ever tell you that while your father was training on Coruscant, C-3PO served your family (Uncle Owen, Aunt Beru, Grandma Shmi, Grandpa Cliegg) for nearly 10 years? Somehow, your uncle didn't recognize Threepio when he returned to family's service."
3. "Hey Luke, did I ever tell you that all Jedi used to dress like homeless moisture farmers the same as I do, despite that still dressing like a Jedi is no good way to hide from Empire? It was a good robe though."
4. "Come here, Luke, today we will be training with this practice droid while you wear this helmet to blindfold yourself. You would think this was an impromptu training procedure, but no, we did this to younglings all the time and even built them special mini helmets. Right now you are literally worse than a child, Luke, like the ones your father killed with that lightsaber you are holding. He was a good friend."
5. "You must go to Dagobah, Luke, and seek out Yoda, the Jedi Master who trained me — well, actually, he's A Jedi Master who trained me. Before I moved up to Liam Neeson's service, I was one of the 20 younglings who went to Yoda's class every tuesday and thursday back in youngling school inbetween Jedi chemistry class and lunchtime. Nothing remarkable or mystic to our relationship at all. He was just my teacher who handed out droids and youngling-sized helmets to the class. Also, all his deep seemingly spur of the moment lessons and teachings from a true master are all fairly common Jedi sayings that he just butchers with his ghetto way of talking. A good friend, he was."
6. "Luke, did I ever tell you about Chewbacca, Han Solo's co-pilot? Well, he and Yoda were friends and fought together against the droid armies before you were born. Even though I will send you to Degobah to train with Yoda, Chewbacca will fail to remember his relationship with Yoda and not tell you that he once knew and fought alongside him. He was a good friend."
7. "Watch out for that vicious bounty hunter Boba Fett, Luke. Did I ever tell you about his father? He was hired to assassinate a senator that me and your father were guarding. We kept bringing her around open windows and public areas in order to draw her would be assassin out, but his cunning surprised even us. He had used his payment to hire another bounty hunter to kill the senator for him while he sent us on a wild bantha chase. And then that 2nd assassin used her payment to buy a robot to assassinate the senator for her. Did I mention the 2nd assassin was a shapeshifter? She could have been a good friend in disguise for all we knew! Where was I? Oh yes, then that robot used its payment to buy poisonous bugs to release into the senator's room while she slept, after lasering a hole through the window. It could have just lasered her because we we weren't watching her at all, but it as not a good shot. So we sense the hostile life forms in the room and rush in and save the senator in the nick of time! Then I jumped out the window to chase the robot back to its owner! Luckily it didn't have a self-destruct function. Then we found the 2nd assassin and chased her across the planet, and caught her when she tried to kill us instead of shapeshifting and escaping. But to our surprise, Jango Fett was watching the whole thing instead of going to kill the senator while we were away chasing the bugs chasing the robot chasing the shapeshifter. He shot her with a poisonous dart instead of sniper blaster, and only her instead of shooting all of us or blowing all of us with a rocket or something, then he escaped with his dumb jetpack. Mace Window killed him later, right in front of Boba. Mace was a good friend. Boba is a bad friend."