Rocko's Modern Life Was Way Dirtier Than You Remember

Featured 01/25/2013

I used to watch Rocko's Modern Life on Nickelodeon when I was a kid, and while I totally remember it being weird I don't think I ever realized quite how dirty it was. There's also a new Rocko's Modern Life movie coming to Netflix in August 2019, the trailer is at the bottom.

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1. The show about a Wallaby immigrating from Australia to the US follows his exploits as he navigates his adopted home. Naturally Masturbation is a common theme.
2. Their favorite restaurant is Chokey Chicken
3. Rocko's favorite hobby is "Jacking", which we're supposed to believe is jackhammering... cuz that makes sense
4. He "Jacks" a lot...
5. a LOT... also, he lives in O-Town
6. Their favorite game is Spank The Monkey
7. In one episode, "Spunky" the dingo falls in love with a mop... cue tunnel/pistons montage and squeaking noises...
8. Heffer, Rocko's (male) best friend goes to a milk farm and accidentally gets hooked up to a milking machine... basically he uses a fleshlight on Nickelodeon.
9. Rocko carries an A$$ cash card
10. Poor bear :-(
11. When Rocko gets sick, obviously he has to get a prostate exam
12. From Dr. Bendova naturally...
13. While camping, Rocko picks what he believes are berries...
14. Like all good Americans, Heffer hosts a nudist BBQ with musical entertainment from The Dangles
15. The No-Tell-Motel offers hourly rates and WaWa beds... when Rocko says he wants the room all night, the attendant tells him he's impressed
16. After losing his job, Rocko takes a gig as a phone sex operator. In this scene he is repeatedly saying "Oh Baby, Oh Baby"
17. Porn is another recurring theme...
18. When Rocko gets a new entertainment system, The first thing they watch is Night of the Shaved Kittens
19. This Gif isn't that dirty but it IS awesome
20. Rocko is introduced to Really Really Big Man, who instructs Rocko to "Gaze into my Nipples of the Future"
21. He means this literally...
22. Felching
23. The episode Closet Clown is about a gay clown
24. In one episode, Rocko's neighbor tries to drug him to take advantage of him. Spanish Fly is actual brown flies wearing sombreros.
25. In Commuted Sentence, Rocko's poor car is impounded and jail raped by a menacing looking Semi-Truck. The impound lot attendant then tells Rocko that his car's nickname is Fancy Fenders
26. Later when Rocko's car finally dies, the letters HIV are clearly spelled out in the background...

1. The show about a Wallaby immigrating from Australia to the US follows his exploits as he navigates his adopted home. Naturally Masturbation is a common theme.
2. Their favorite restaurant is Chokey Chicken
3. Rocko's favorite hobby is "Jacking", which we're supposed to believe is jackhammering... cuz that makes sense
4. He "Jacks" a lot...
5. a LOT... also, he lives in O-Town
6. Their favorite game is Spank The Monkey
7. In one episode, "Spunky" the dingo falls in love with a mop... cue tunnel/pistons montage and squeaking noises...
8. Heffer, Rocko's (male) best friend goes to a milk farm and accidentally gets hooked up to a milking machine... basically he uses a fleshlight on Nickelodeon.
9. Rocko carries an A$$ cash card
10. Poor bear :-(
11. When Rocko gets sick, obviously he has to get a prostate exam
12. From Dr. Bendova naturally...
13. While camping, Rocko picks what he believes are berries...
14. Like all good Americans, Heffer hosts a nudist BBQ with musical entertainment from The Dangles
15. The No-Tell-Motel offers hourly rates and WaWa beds... when Rocko says he wants the room all night, the attendant tells him he's impressed
16. After losing his job, Rocko takes a gig as a phone sex operator. In this scene he is repeatedly saying "Oh Baby, Oh Baby"
17. Porn is another recurring theme...
18. When Rocko gets a new entertainment system, The first thing they watch is Night of the Shaved Kittens
19. This Gif isn't that dirty but it IS awesome
20. Rocko is introduced to Really Really Big Man, who instructs Rocko to "Gaze into my Nipples of the Future"
21. He means this literally...
22. Felching
23. The episode Closet Clown is about a gay clown
24. In one episode, Rocko's neighbor tries to drug him to take advantage of him. Spanish Fly is actual brown flies wearing sombreros.
25. In Commuted Sentence, Rocko's poor car is impounded and jail raped by a menacing looking Semi-Truck. The impound lot attendant then tells Rocko that his car's nickname is Fancy Fenders
26. Later when Rocko's car finally dies, the letters HIV are clearly spelled out in the background...

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1. The show about a Wallaby immigrating from Australia to the US follows his exploits as he navigates his adopted home. Naturally Masturbation is a common theme.

2. Their favorite restaurant is Chokey Chicken

3. Rocko's favorite hobby is "Jacking", which we're supposed to believe is jackhammering... cuz that makes sense

4. He "Jacks" a lot...

5. a LOT... also, he lives in O-Town

6. Their favorite game is Spank The Monkey

7. In one episode, "Spunky" the dingo falls in love with a mop... cue tunnel/pistons montage and squeaking noises...

8. Heffer, Rocko's (male) best friend goes to a milk farm and accidentally gets hooked up to a milking machine... basically he uses a fleshlight on Nickelodeon.

9. Rocko carries an A$$ cash card

10. Poor bear :-(

11. When Rocko gets sick, obviously he has to get a prostate exam

12. From Dr. Bendova naturally...

13. While camping, Rocko picks what he believes are berries...

14. Like all good Americans, Heffer hosts a nudist BBQ with musical entertainment from The Dangles

15. The No-Tell-Motel offers hourly rates and WaWa beds... when Rocko says he wants the room all night, the attendant tells him he's impressed

16. After losing his job, Rocko takes a gig as a phone sex operator. In this scene he is repeatedly saying "Oh Baby, Oh Baby"

17. Porn is another recurring theme...

18. When Rocko gets a new entertainment system, The first thing they watch is Night of the Shaved Kittens

19. This Gif isn't that dirty but it IS awesome

20. Rocko is introduced to Really Really Big Man, who instructs Rocko to "Gaze into my Nipples of the Future"

21. He means this literally...

22. Felching

23. The episode Closet Clown is about a gay clown

24. In one episode, Rocko's neighbor tries to drug him to take advantage of him. Spanish Fly is actual brown flies wearing sombreros.

25. In Commuted Sentence, Rocko's poor car is impounded and jail raped by a menacing looking Semi-Truck. The impound lot attendant then tells Rocko that his car's nickname is Fancy Fenders

26. Later when Rocko's car finally dies, the letters HIV are clearly spelled out in the background...