woman biting her thumbnail on couch

The apparent rules for heterosexuality are evolving all the time, but it's unclear exactly who's writing them. Recently, a woman opened up a wormhole after tweeting that she considers ordering dessert to be a "female thing."

She then added that even ordering appetizers is unmanly.

Some women defended the statement. The implied logic being that showing a want for dessert is fun and frivolous, and those qualities are understood to be gay in men(?).

One woman even suggested that men who simply eat dessert are gay.

The comment raised some interesting ideas about whether certain parts of a meal can be considered more homo- or heterosexual. (If appetizers are apparently gay, what does that mean for side dishes?)

But soon men from all directions—Right, Left, and gay—starting chiming in to say that there's nothing gay at all about eating or ordering dessert.

Then came the trolls to be the voice of chaotic reason.

Ultimately this idea ties into the longer-standing joke about very basic, everyday things supposedly being markers of gayness. "Fellas, is it gay to take out the trash?" "Is it gay to be a man?"

We're not sure what new ground this discourse will creep into next, but it will likely be just as braindead.