Funny articles

After Socialist Wins New York Mayoral Election, More Rich People Are Moving to New York

I thought you guys said they were all going to leave?

The Internet Thinks Trump Is Being Treated for Alzheimer’s

This would explain a lot.

Sam Altman of OpenAI Also Wants to Go To Space Now

We should let him. Now, should we let him come back?

Internet Users Are Saving Money by Buying Their Clothes from Unclaimed Baggage

You can only get this drip from a stranger’s Samsonite.

The Dollar Tree Is Quietly Raising Prices

At least we still have the Costco hot dog.

One Million Bags of Shredded Cheese Recalled Due to ‘Shards of Metal’

There’s metal in the shredded cheese, I repeat, there’s metal in the shredded cheese.

The Internet is Sharing Their Love for Paul Dano After Quentin Tarantino Called Him ‘Weak Sauce’

Where are my fellow Paul Dano heads at?

YouTuber Singlehandedly Crashes Rare Plant Market By Cloning Niche Plants

Plants belong to the people!

Reddit’s r/Art Subreddit Apologizes After Realizing 98.2% of Bans Were For Petty, Invalid Reasons

Stuck up people on unnecessary power trips? In the art community?!

New Pentagon Press Reporter Was Once a 3.8-Star Cameo Creator

‘Enshittification’ Might Explain Why Everything Sucks Now

There are surely other reasons, too.

Ivy League Students Are Claiming Disabilities and Receiving More ‘Special Accommodations’ Than Ever Before

Around 40% of Stanford students now say they require “special accommodations.”

Man Who Ordered $1,200 GPU from Best Buy Was Sent a Box of Rocks Instead

Were the rocks cool at least?

Users of Google’s New AI Tool Say It’s Deleting Their Hard Drives

That does seem like a pretty major flaw.

IRS Says It Needs to Watch Your OnlyFans Content to See If You Qualify for ‘No Tax On Tips’

Throw it back hard enough, and they might just give you a tax break!

New Zealand Man Arrested for Swallowing $19,000 Fabergé Egg

Police are currently waiting to retrieve the egg.

Study Finds 95% of Black Friday Purchases Were Financed

That can’t be good.

Companies Are Complaining That Young People Aren’t Spending Enough Money on Stupid Things

You could always, you know, pay them more.

White House Budget Chief Russ Vought Caught Doodling During Cabinet Meeting

Of course, you’re doodling during a meeting, you’re twelve.

Simon Cowell Says He’s Sorry for Being a Jerk on ‘American Idol’

Too little, too late.

Saudi Arabia Just Opened a ‘Wild West’-Themed City

They’re not just performing “Cowboy Justice” on journalists anymore!

‘Health Influencers’ Are Now Just Eating Baking Soda

The new “endurance hack” is treating yourself like a cookie.

Home Security Cameras Keep Getting Hacked and Used for Blackmail

If you have a video camera pointed anywhere personal, throw it away.

People Think Kim Kardashian Is Soft Launching a Neuralink

According to her doctor, she does need one.